Jenny Lehtonen
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A Midnight Muse

9/2/2016

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We shall see what this blog will end up becoming. Music? Philosophy? Simply a recollection of events in the past month? Yes, a monthly update could be nice, which I will post around the internet for people who are interested in my academic and musical doings. How often I post will probably depend on if anything of unusual interest or thought arises.

It has now been about 2 full weeks of school at CCM. I've enjoyed it immensely already and have had my expectations exceeded. CCM Philharmonia and Chamber Winds are the ensembles I'm going to perform in this semester, and these are outstanding ensembles, particularly the Philharmonia. I don't think I've played in a better orchestra before. I also have a feeling that private lessons and studio class here at CCM are going to be way better experiences for me than I've had before.  Things are certainly different than what I'm use to, but then again, a lot has seemed to stay the same. New people, new things to learn, new challenges. But in many ways I feel as if I've known these people my whole life. I've yet to come to know these people around me, to find these kindred spirits. I know they're here.

Living alone has been great too, the freedom and independence. Strangely no feelings of isolation (yet) or even the creepy sensation of being all alone late at night. Music helps. College single dorm life was like that too after all. An empty apartment with no one except me isn't so bad. But now I have goals! I hope in the future to invite people to come to my place, to liven it up and have fun! We'll see how that goes in the future.

I've also yet to really get to know the people at New City Presbyterian Church. I have a goal to enter into closer fellowship with those my age, particularly those who live near me, and have a real Christian community to bond with. I've not joined any Christian ministries on the UC campus yet because I'm not yet sure about it. Perhaps church will be enough for me for now.

And will I get a chance to make money, to have a little job?? So many goals, aspirations, wishes!

Perhaps rather than brood endlessly about the things I want, or even things I need, it's best to pray and offer them up to God. Several times in the past few weeks I've felt his presence heavily, in ways too personal and bizarre to even describe here (this blog won't be a personal diary like that!), but in a good way. Very good way. God is looking out for me. He's with me. Whom shall I fear?

I'll end each blog with a Dostoevsky quote or Scripture, either way, something that inspires me at the time. I thought of these verses just now with regards to my recent happenings...

"Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you." 1 Peter 5:6-7

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Picture taken earlier this evening (9/1)
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